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woman has deepened spiritually and intuitively, wants to know where she can go to find community

19 Apr
A woman who feels she threatens others in her church community because of the way she has deepened spiritually and intuitively, wants to know where she can go to find community..
Dear BR,
I just finished your book, Your Sixth Sense. I’ve always been highly intuitive and just always "knew" people. I am very open, even though I was raised in a very left-brain environment and repressive atmosphere. I have experienced infinity but can’t explain it to others in words. Many church people can’t seem to handle infinity or cosmic understanding, and I’m sort of grappling. I have a deep understanding of others. I don’t have a superior attitude towards them, but generally empathize wth who and where they are. However, I find that who I am is too much for them. I am limited in how much I am able to be myself because it threatens others. It is a lonely feeling, and discombobulating to boot! I feel connected to others, but they do not feel connected to me, so I feel alone and set apart by my growth. I see others living a veneer of a life, content and happy to just splash in the shallows. I am compelled int othe depths, but the deeper I go, the more others can’t see me. Does that make sense? The church has an image of the Body of Christ - we are all one. Others don’t expereince this. Where do I go to find people who see as I do? I have church friends whom I dearly love but who are unable to see past their dogma. Where do I go to find people who see from their hearts, who understand that intuition is God’s voice, guiding us? Where and how do I find community?

Sincerely,
Mary P.




Dear Mary,
For someone who perceives life as mystical unity and infinite oneness, you sure have a knack for polarizing the world into "us" and "them"! Please re-read your message and check out how many times you separate yourself from others, and - I hate to say it - put yourself above others. You’re deep; they’re shallow. You are growing; they are stagnant. You understand others; they don’t get you. You are open; they are dogmatic and repressive. Shall I continue, or do you catch my drift? You’ve backed yourself into a lonely corner with your judgments - just like those repressive people who raised you!

I would respectfully suggest that you may know others, but still have a ways to go in order to know yourself. Rather than focus on the flawed mindset of those around you, how about going after more self-awareness and knowledge of your own needs, drives and motives - and what it is within YOU that keeps you apart from others. The truth is, no one is ever "too much" for their community - that’s a rationalization, and one with a superior edge to it. Indeed, you can’t be too wise, intuitive or spiritual for other people. That isn’t ever the problem. The "threat" you pose is social and interpersonal - the way you present yourself to others, that makes people feel less than you. You may be imposing your views or ideas on people in an untimely way or to the wrong people. This is about sensitivity, timing, respect and true openness to the sensibility of others. Your note shows you have some homework to do in this regard, Mary.

You may indeed be in the wrong community for where your life’s path is right now. If so, you can find like-minded people all over the place - in fact, being as how you’re from Northern Ohio, you could start by taking courses or workshops at the Sofia Center at Ursuline College, for instance - that place is swamped with wonderful seekers, just like you! So is the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland. And numerous groups organized around developing capabilities for healing, intuition and spirituality. But a little look within is indicated first, or you’ll be disappointed wherever you go.

Good luck.



Belleruth Naparstek

Psychotherapist, author and guided imagery pioneer Belleruth Naparstek is the creator of the popular Health Journeys guided imagery audio series. Her latest book on imagery and posttraumatic stress, Invisible Heroes: Survivors of Trauma and How They Heal (Bantam Dell), won the Spirituality & Health Top 50 Books Award