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A 39 yr-old woman with severe PTSD, suffering from paralysis, insomnia and precipitous weight loss,

16 Jan
A 39 yr-old woman with severe PTSD, suffering from paralysis, insomnia and precipitous weight loss, finds hope and encouragement, thanks to the seventh doctor she consults and some new information about posttraumatic stress..
I am a 39 year old white female. I have been paralyzed in bed for two years, due to severe PTSD. I lost a twelve year job from PTSD and have been unable to continue to work. My parents have fed me, bathed me, and have taken full time care of me since becoming paralyzed with PTSD.

I had almost lost my marriage, I think, to this situation. The shame and anger I felt towards myself for my body not working, but not knowing why, and being told by all kinds of friends and family "just move on... get over it... you are depressed" and so on, just made me worse.

I was in shock and could not taste my food. Even four sleeping pills a night would not break the insomnia cycle of trauma, and now we know why.

My trauma was from an ex-husband’s long-term domestic violence, and he now has criminal charges against him, because he kept breaking the protective order. I lived years, and still live, thinking he would kill me. I finally got rid of the person who was the threat, but the terror never left me.

I also am legally blind and was raped the same day as my eye surgery. I blocked this out and it took years to come to terms with this victimization that I didn''t deserve.

After losing massive weight and not sleeping one hour in two years, thinking I would die, we finally found a doctor in Tulsa to diagnose me with PTSD and he immediately referred us to all of Belleruth''s books and CD''s. I had gone to six doctors before in Tulsa, and nobody even came close - they kept looking for disease with the severe weight loss - even though I''d told all the doctors what I''d been through with trauma - but nobody listened.

My family and I never knew about PTSD, but it is crippling. I feel Belleruth''s book, along with this new doctor I have found, has saved my life. This doctor has referred us to a PTSD counselor specialist in Tulsa.

(My mother is a Hospice Chaplain and father a retired minister. They are both about 70 years old and I should be taking care of them, not the other way around.)

My whole life has changed because of being paralyzed by PTSD and not understanding what was happening to me, until I almost lost my life due to fatigue and weight loss. My body could not sustain itself without ANY sleep for years.

I now hope some day to have a productive life again. I am so sorry more doctors don''t know about PTSD - especially right here in Tulsa, so close to the OKC bombing, and yet nobody could diagnose me!

Belleruth’s book has changed my life and given me hope.
Most Sincerely,
Renata C.
Belleruth Naparstek

Psychotherapist, author and guided imagery pioneer Belleruth Naparstek is the creator of the popular Health Journeys guided imagery audio series. Her latest book on imagery and posttraumatic stress, Invisible Heroes: Survivors of Trauma and How They Heal (Bantam Dell), won the Spirituality & Health Top 50 Books Award