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Why Bad Boys Appeal to Good Girls

16 Sep

Hello, all.  

I was talking recently with a friend who was gnashing his teeth over his concern for his much adored, twenty-something niece, who got caught up in a relationship with a “Bad Boy”. This was a bafflingly lousy match for a terrific young woman who seemed to have everything going for her – but for this appalling love interest.  He was a guy from the wrong side of the tracks in every possible way – emotionally, ethically, socio-economically and aesthetically.

Our conversation reminded me of a wonderfully wise, hip, funny advice blog (proto-blog, really – it was created before the word “blog” ever existed) by Lynn Harris for romantically downhearted young adults.  Back in the day, I had a very good time providing psych consultation to Lynn when she had a clinical question. 

In a graphic novel format, it featured a super-heroine, Breakup Girl (with a cape made from a blanket) whose motto was, “When it’s over, I’ll be right over.”

BG (aka Lynn) always got a lot of questions like my friend’s, both from nice boys wondering why they kept getting rejected for these jerks; and from nice girls asking why they were so attracted to them.  

So I thought it might be timely to post the link to this conversation, which still gets a ton of views, and I suspect, due to the timelessness of the topic, always will.   

Here is what Breakup Girl has to say to all the Good Girls and Sweet Boys who wonder about the appeal of the Bad Boy:  Enjoy the wit and humanity of Lynn Harris by clicking here.

Take care and be well,

Belleruth Naparstek

Psychotherapist, author and guided imagery pioneer Belleruth Naparstek is the creator of the popular Health Journeys guided imagery audio series. Her latest book on imagery and posttraumatic stress, Invisible Heroes: Survivors of Trauma and How They Heal (Bantam Dell), won the Spirituality & Health Top 50 Books Award